would you take it?

 I found this quote on my internet travels. The thing for me though is yeah some of my family are really supportive but it my friends are more of a family for me. This quote has kind off give me a topic to write about in this Blog because i have attempting suicide in the past and recently so i know what i am talking about. The first couple of times in a passed out before i could finish my life, when i woke i just felt really ill. This made me realise that if i was going to finish my life i would have to be a bit more inventive, but when it came to it i did the same mistake i passed out before i could finish the job but this time i was found by a friend, i was taking to my local accident and emergency where i end up getting stomach pumped not the best thing but when i woke and saw my friends face i realised how much it hurt her with tears streaming down her face and cuddling me this is when i realised i was been selfish. Yeah i am pain but as soon as i leave the pain then passes on to the people who care about me. I still think about suicide on a regular basis and if i could end it without hurting anyone i would definitely take it because the time i was caught just show the pain is real to me. To other people all the see me as is a happy bubbly person who is happy to help anyone out at any time. Which is far from the truth. The thing is though i would rather put myself through pain but self-harming at the moment because i want to prove to other people i can be strong enough to get through this holiday without doing something