The weather is deciding to torture me the last couple of days, by deciding it would be good to have roasting hot days when I have recently self harmed. The problem with this heat is when people begin question why i am wearing a long sleeved top or jumper, i have to lie saying i am fine.
Today was one of these days, i had a pair of light washed jeans and a jumper on as i was just sitting in the house, the house was a reasonable temperature, plus no-one was in everyone was out in the garden enjoying the sun, i isolate till about the back of two, so i decide to join them of course with my book this way no-one would talk to me and i have done this a few time so i knew it would work. However fifteen minutes of me been out someone said to me take your jumper of you will be cooking, i used the excuse is i am fine and continued to use this for the next hour. i began to feel the heat and didn't people to wonder to much.
Let me explain something first I harm myself where ever i can get to first and on one occasion during last week i had a pair of jammie shorts on and a jumper on the top half and of course a t-shirt. I went straight to the lower leg to get my fix. In the morning no-one noticed it because i did it on the side so it was like in the middle so when both my legs are together you would see it.
I came into the house at the back of three to change in to shorts but was still anxious that someone would see the cut on my lower leg. So before i went back out I practised how i was going to sit so no-one would notice it. Half an hour later i head back out, people question why it took me so long to put shorts on and take my jumper on ( I put a long sleeved top on instead but made of thinner material) I just pretended like i didnt hear them. Someone did notice the cut on my leg and ask how I had done it, My quickest reaction ever i did it while shaving, that shut them up.
Really hope the weather in Scotland starts to cool down again so I dont look so insane
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